10,000 Feet Above: What Not To Do On An Airplane

I love being on a plane. There’s something about being suspended in the air with other people, all of you with places to be, and having one goal throughout the whole trip – be tolerable. However, there are still some who know nothing of decency and flight etiquette. 

We’re cultured people, but in case you’ve never flown before and need a little help in this area, you’ve come to the right place. I’ve compiled an unordered list of things you shouldn’t do on a flight, whether it’s to please your fellow passengers or give yourself the best experience. Vous ne voudriez pas que les gens sont agacés par vous sur 10,000 pieds au-dessus du sol!

1. Drink Coffee or Tea

I understand you need your caffeine fix – especially for extra long flights – but here’s a little secret: airplane tap water is often used to prepare hot drinks, and they are notoriously prone to bacteria. Yeah. Your best bet would be to choose bottled or canned beverages instead.

2. Wear Contact Lenses

Contacts already dry your eyes when you’re on land, and they can irritate them even more because of the airplane’s dry air. If you want to look fresh when getting out of the plane however, save putting on contacts minutes before landing or take a quick bathroom stop and pop them on there.

3. Take Your Socks Off

Yes, you want to get comfortable. Yes, you want to rest your feet for the whole flight. NO, you can’t expose your feet to every poor soul on the plane, athlete’s foot or not. Also, can you imagine your bare feet touching the floor where other people have come and gone?

4. Stay In Your Seat The Entire Flight

Even if you’re on a First Class flight, and even if the seats are comfortable and can be laid down as a bed, it’s still best to move around the plane when it is allowed. Stretch those limbs and twist your body a little to give your joints a little massage. Give those butt cheeks a rest – ils vous remercieront plus tard.

5. Recline During Meal Times

This, I don’t understand. The fact that it’s meal time indicates that people will be needing the table attached to the back of your seat. I don’t know what sort of people do this, but it happens, and it is not funny. It’s also etiquette to let the person behind you know you’ll be reclining your seat when you need to, or just quickly check

6. Berate the Flight Attendants

I’ve seen this happen a few times during my own travels, and it gives off a sour vibe across the whole cabin. It not only makes the flight uncomfortable for you and the stewardess, but it extends to other passengers as well. 

What’s terrible about all this is that people often complain about things the cabin crew don’t have control over. Complaints like how little legroom you have or that booze is expensive on the flight are our of the crew’s hands. Some have even gotten angry over the fact that the chips being handed out are just “air” when they open it and the chips themselves are almost non-existent. Ces personnes travaillent fort et ne peuvent pas contrôler ce qu’elles servent. Mieux encore, obtenez un billet d’avion en première classe la prochaine fois.

7. Eat Stinky Food

You know your favorite burger full of onions, pickles, and whatever else you like? Yeah, you can’t eat that on the plane. It’s not actually a case of not being able to because you can, but if you’re aware of flight etiquette, you wouldn’t even think of it. Imagine sitting next to someone eating a meal of curry, onions, and other pungent food. That smell will just circulate around the plane and stay there until you land. Je ne veux pas être cette personne.

8. Put Your Carry-on in the Overhead Bin Not Directly Above You

Two rules: (1) If you have a roller suitcase or a duffel bag, put that in the bin, and (2) if you don’t have a need for the overhead bins, don’t take it and waste the space. Don’t be a dick and place your laptop bag or medium-sized backpack up there when it can perfectly fit in front of you or by your feet.

9. Forget to Put On Deodorant

You’ll be packed in a cabin with a number of people for hours. Do you really want to be that person who starts to reek and costs everybody a comfortable flight? Pas de miel. Practice proper grooming, regardless of your flight type and duration.

10. Wear Tight Clothing

Plane rides can get a little tight and stressful. Don’t make your situation worse by wearing tight clothes and unnecessary glamorous fabric. I know you want to look great even on the flight, but if you’re flying for 19 hours, would you really be comfortable wearing sequins or a tight leather jacket? My personal preferences? Cotton, silk, or cashmere. There are lots of loose yet fashionable choices out there.

11. Try New Medication

Please, please be responsible enough to know that new medication can have unexpected side-effects. This shouldn’t even be on the list because it’s so logical to not realize. 

12. Get Mad at the Person In Front of You For Reclining 

I’ve been guilty of this a few times, but I never shout or become violent towards the person in front of me. Airplane seats were made to recline, so it shouldn’t anger you if people actually do it. There are others who recline it so far back that it really disturbs you, and most of the time, a gentle “excuse me, but can you adjust your seat a little” can work like magic. If that person refuses and you are incredibly, terriblyuncomfortable, call the attention of a stewardess.